Is it true that opposites attract?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yes, and no. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Often, we are attracted to character strengths that are opposite to our own perceived weaknesses. For example, an introverted person might be attracted to a more out-going person and vice-versa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But having different communication styles doesn\u2019t mean that we don\u2019t hold the same values and attitudes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rather than thinking in terms of opposites<\/em>, it\u2019s better to think about you and your partner as being complementary <\/em>to each other. \u200d\u2764\ufe0f\u200d <\/p>\n\n\n\n —————————————<\/p>\n\n\n\n Relationship experts all agree that the \u201c3 C\u2019s\u201d – communication, clarity, and compromise<\/strong> – are necessary for any successful relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is not only true in marriage, but also with friendships and business relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In a relationship-based business, such as\u2014oh, I dunno, let\u2019s say Real Estate<\/em>\u2014understanding how to modify your own style to communicate better with a different style is arguably the most important skill you can learn. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s doubly important and doubly complex because practically every day, we\u2019re dealing with two people at once\u2014the married couple\u2014who rarely have the same communication style as each other!<\/p>\n\n\n\n So, how is it possible to communicate effectively with two different communication styles at once? <\/p>\n\n\n\n —————————————<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s say you\u2019re doing a listing presentation to a couple. One is an Expressive, and one is an Analytical (polar opposites).<\/p>\n\n\n\n How do you deal with that situation?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Amateurs will present to the person they are the most comfortable with (the one with a communication style closest to their own).<\/p>\n\n\n\n That\u2019s a massive mistake. You may think, \u201cAt least I\u2019ve got a 50\/50 chance\u201d, but that\u2019s completely wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You think only one <\/em>of them is the decision-maker? Ha! Maybe in the 1950s. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Today, couples have to <\/strong>AGREE <\/em><\/strong>on important decisions. If they disagree, the answer is NO. \u200d\u2640\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n An expert presents to a couple by switching styles, back and forth, throughout the presentation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, with an Expressive\/Analytical combo, you\u2019d better sit down before <\/em>the presentation and establish rapport with the Expressive partner before you even start talking about Market Stats with the Analytical partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBut Ted! If I switch back and forth throughout the presentation, won\u2019t that interrupt the flow and slow things down?\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n That\u2019s amateur-thinking. Couples have already learned to appreciate their different styles and to be patient with each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sure, maybe it takes a bit longer, but it\u2019s WAY more important to make an impression on both <\/em>partners than it is to burn through your presentation as fast as you can.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Yes, I\u2019m talking to you, Drivers. (Drivers are the most resistant to modifying their own style).<\/p>\n\n\n\n By the way, I\u2019ve never met a REALTOR\u00ae who didn\u2019t believe themselves to be at least a borderline expert on this topic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n And yet, the only ones I\u2019ve met who actually were truly <\/em>experts are those who devoted considerable time to study, practice, and developing their skills, specifically in this area. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s no coincidence that these were also the most \u201cnaturally\u201d successful agents I\u2019ve met.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you think you\u2019re a natural at this, I can assure you, you are NOT. But it\u2019s not hard to learn. Just make it a priority to learn more about communication styles. Take a course. Any course. Please!<\/p>\n\n\n\n —————————————<\/p>\n\n\n\n This article was inspired by module #7 – Communication Styles – part of the Agent Skills Master\u2019s Program<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Within this module, you\u2019ll learn about all four unique communication styles, what makes them tick, and how to modify your own style to build trust and deep personal relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n